Why Am I Always Happy?

The short answer to that is because I am a Christian who has a real relationship with Jesus and my identity is in Him. But life would be boring if it consisted only of short answers to questions like this. So I'm going to go ahead and get into the analytical depths of this topic.

The truth is that sometimes people who have a real relationship with Jesus aren't always happy. And I most certainly didn't get there until after a bunch of life lessons, realizations, and epiphanies. But it makes me very happy that people tell me that what they like about me is that I'm always happy and smiling. It also makes me happy that my happiness is for real -- I don't do it just to put up a front.

There are several reasons for it. First of all, my life is richly blessed and I really think it'd take an extremely stupid individual not to be happy in my circumstances. I have two mega nice jobs in this economy, and even though I hate one of them, I will admit that it's a pretty good deal that some others only dream of. I have a lot of people who are ready to be there for me if I need them, and who truly care. The people I love all love me back and want me in their lives. My family is incredible. I have an apartment with a mind blowing view that I can easily afford. I'm healthy to the bone. I have endless opportunities to pursue my hobbies and aspirations. I say that's enough for happiness already, yet I see people out there who have it all, and more, and still can't find the happiness within them. Therefore, it's obvious that it's an emotion rooted on the inside of us and does not depend on the circumstances around, even though we might think it does.

What aided my happiness was a piece of advise someone somewhat wise once gave me: don't expect anything from anyone. Brilliant! I've stuck with it for years now, and it has worked incredibly well. Not only does it eliminate dependence on others to make you feel a certain way, but it also makes those around you happier because there's no pressure on them to make you feel good. Instead, you can cheer them up just by being cheerful! It also makes the moments when people come through for you extra special. Since you don't expect anything from them, it's a nice surprise when they do something good, and it makes you happier than you would've been if they simply met your expectations.

The final reason for my happiness most certainly drives some people insane because they feel like they don't ever have all of me. But oh well. My parents taught me to give my all, but never feel like I own something or someone. This way if I am forced to let go, I am not too attached for that to make my world crash. Of course, this has been difficult in the past, especially with people. There were a few on whom I depended entirely, whose actions and words set my mood, and who destroyed me when they left. But I learned my lesson. I now love without expecting anything in return, and if people don't want me in their lives, I won't force myself on them. My life is not identified by anyone or anything in it. Learning that was a breakthrough for happiness.

And last, but not least, is the aforementioned fact that I have a relationship with Jesus. However, having a relationship and rooting an identity are two entirely different things. My God is the only one who loves me unconditionally and on whom I can depend to take care of me in all aspects -- emotional, physical, and spiritual. He is the only one who never changes and who has and will always be there. There is no risk of Him leaving, and whatever He does in my life, although sometimes painful, I can be assured is for the best. He has given me all the tools for happiness. I just had to learn how to use them.

Abandoned Blog

It's really sad to go through blogs on blogspot and bump into "ghost blogs" -- the ones that were active for a long time, but haven't been updated for years. As sad as it is, mine has lately turned into one of those. And although it hasn't been years, I have most certainly not been as diligent about writing as I should be. But perhaps there are reasons for it. I somewhat keep a journal. Or rather, I've somewhat kept a journal for years. Somewhat, because I notice that I only write in it when nothing really exciting is going on in my life. Once REALLY, TRULY exciting things start happening there is simply no time for writing. It's been the same with the blogs.

When I first moved to Seattle I had all the time in the world to write/explore/think/analyze/notice. But lately my life has filled up with people and events that are Novel material. Not blog. The things that fill my life are so interesting, intimate, and intense that I simply can't open them up for the world to see. Hence the silence, while I deal with unpredictable turns of events and difficult decisions.

I've had people comment to me and say that my life sounds like a life of a celebrity. All I can say is -- you have no idea! Life is such an interesting thing, and it throws us curve balls that make us learn, reconsider, re identify and rethink. It makes us realize that what we once considered solid truth might not be applicable in all situations. That what we've been attached to and afraid to let go of has only been holding us back from things infinitely more worthy and exciting. That what we were afraid of finding ironically can quickly turn into something we are afraid to lose...

I'll try to be more diligent about sharing thoughts and experiences, especially on Seattle. I'll try to stop being philosophical and get back to the humorous side of life. But as always, i don't promise anything... I just hope that it works out, do my best, and hope for the best!