The Naked Cowgirls of Salsa (This post is as clean as it gets. Don't worry :)

Over the past few days I've encountered a couple situations which made me realize that some people have a serious malfunction. In their wardrobe.

I brought a friend to the outdoor dancing at Occidental Park last Thursday. It was her first time at a Salsa function, and I was hoping for a wonderful first impression. But the first words out of her mouth were "Hey, check out that girl in the black dress dancing over there. You can see her underwear when she spins! I just hope she isn't wearing a thong. Yup. She's wearing a thong!!! Stacy! OMG! That's so funny!" Funny wasn't exactly what I was going for in an introduction to the wonderful world of Salsa. Sophisticated. Fun. Lively. Inspiring... But not inappropriate and certainly not funny!

Fast forward three days and you'll find me at another Salsa event. There aren't that many people here, and I'm having the time of my life with a wonderful lead. All of a sudden, this normally extremely attentive man forgets to let me know what's coming next and upon glancing at his gaze I see that he's completely taken by something other than our dancing. "Oh! Sorry, I got a little distracted," he offers apologetically. I turn around to check out the source of distraction and see a girl in cowboy boots and a long shirt. I would be thrilled to tell you that she was attractive, ugly, tall, short, blond or brunette. But unfortunately the only feature that stuck out to me (as well as the rest of the floor) was that she wasn't wearing any pants. That's right. NO PANTS! Even I lost concentration. What WOULD anyone expect of a normal guy!

Girls, just as I reminded the young creepster at practica that my eyes are a little further up than he was looking, I would like to remind you that Salsa functions are not clubs. Especially the ones taking place at public venues, such as a park in the middle of downtown. There are kids there! (And there WERE kids at both places I just talked about.) When you go shopping for that perfect Salsa dress, take a spin in the fitting room! Take a spin, and then a sudden stop, and see if the dress is showing your underwear. If it is, DON'T BUY IT. And if for any reason you still can't part with the dress, at least don't wear a thong! As unattractive as you might feel wearing boy-shorts or hip-huggers... the rest of the world just doesn't want a free show from you. I know they say the best things in life are free... but that's not exactly the case here. And a long shirt is NOT considered to be a dress. Nobody should be going outside wearing that in the first place. Much less should they be stopping by a Salsa scene and dancing dressed like that. Oh. My bad. Undressed like that.

I don't really understand the motives either. If these girls want attention... isn't 4-5 minutes of dancing with a man who's concentrated solely on you enough? Or are they simply incapable of holding his attention for that long without taking something off? If they just don't realize it... Don't they have mirrors? Maybe friends who will kindly tell them they look ridiculous? Or maybe they are trying to become a female version of the Naked Cowboy.(http://www.nakedcowboy.com/akki/)I guess nobody mentioned to them that Occidental Park is no Times Square. I'm flabbergasted... But I hope that they read this post and start buying clothes that cover their bodies. At least in parts that are meant to be covered AT ALL TIMES.

Have some respect girls. If not for yourselves, at least for the people trying to have some clean fun around you. Thanks!